YES,I AM A LIVING CORPSE!!!!!

"IF HER DRESS IS TOO SHORT,THEN SHE IS CALLING FOR RAPE"-the SOCIETY

  That cold and windy night of December.That night..that very night which robbed me off everything that meant to more than my virginity.It snatched away my identity,my right to live and my very urge to exist.It extinguished my flaming soul.That fateful night has left me half dead.Now,i'm just a living corpse who is determined to stay alive.Trying to breathe and trying to survive.That man had raped me once but the road to justice,filled with thorns,is killing me every single day.

The dirty touches,filthy gropes,unmasked stares,his raving madness,his vile gestures,his monstrous laughter and my bloodcurdling cries still echoes painfully inside the darkness corners of my mind.How could i forget his two burning orbs of embers filled with reckless desire.Those wretched hands of Beelzebub still torments me in my nightmares.I eerily feel monsters lurking around me,waiting for a chance to ponce at me.

The doctors,so called guardian angel of the victims,did nothing to help me except to sneer and jeer sneakingly at me.On the other hand,the lawyers ,the so called upholders of justice questioned me again and again on my "perceived" shamelessness.Bright flashes of camera,long hours of standing in the court and constant questions raised on my character and integrity perturb me.It leaves me with a deep sense of dejection and voidness .Sometimes,their constant humiliations angers me and some other time their silence rebukes me.

I pause and think whether I was really wrong?Was the society right in admonishing me that girls are supposed to stay behind the doors?Was my dress too short?Was it neck too deep?Was it too ravishing?Did I cover myself properly?Did I walk like a woman?Did I commit anything wrong to believe that men and women are equal on the platlers of justice?Why  should a girl be questioned like this from the day she is born?Being a girl is painstakingly beautiful.Acceptance becomes her chanting mantra.From accepting the deeply rooted societal norms,leaving her own family for a stranger's house during marriage to accepting all those unwanted stares and suffocating gropes.

But being a girl has also taught me to be courageous. Against all these odds,I will fight till I die.I will not fight only for myself  but for all women caged on the pretext of protection and conservatism.I still believe that I am as pure as virgin Mary and posses the strength of goddess Kali.I still believe that I'm progeny of Mother Teressa,Lakshmibai,as well as other innumerable women who have made their mark from all walks of life.

YES! I WILL FIGHT TILL I DIE , LIKE THEM...........

Krishnendu k Jayaraj

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